Under the Kilt: Keeping the flame going

Courtesy of Pexels
Courtesy of Pexels

Summer is almost always an obstacle in college relationships, whether it’s due to the fact that you both will be moving to separate areas after graduation, or you both currently live on opposing sides of the state or country, even. You won’t be seeing each other almost every day like it was during school (if you’re both not taking summer school and don’t live together), and it’ll probably start to feel a little weird to not have your significant other around.

Among the celebration of graduation and the rapid approach of the real world, your relationship is also something to consider. Some may use summer vacation to test the relationship in order to see if it’s worth sticking around, and others may use the time as a period to initiate a breakup and experience the single life yet again.

Unfortunately, it can be hard to coordinate your future to match your significant others’ if you have differing interests and oftentimes you will both end up at different locations based on where your opportunities lead you. In order to not hold your partner back, you’ll eventually have to learn to adapt to long distance, if you feel that the relationship is worthwhile.

Long distance can be difficult, but if you both put in the time and effort to keep the spark alive, it can strengthen your relationship immensely. Skyping during free time or making the drive to see each other once in a while are only two of the many examples that can help. Distance is an annoying barrier, but it can definitely be overcome as long as you both want to stay in touch. Just imagine the next time you see him or her after a while of being apart; you’ll most likely be more affectionate and you’ll cherish the moments that you have together even more since they don’t come by as often.

On the other hand, you may begin to realize that the person you’re currently involved with might not be the best option for the future. Your relationship during college was entertaining nonetheless, but when it comes to the real world, things start to get more serious. You would have to factor in your living situation, job, graduate school if that applies and based on the status of your relationship, your partner can either help you or bring you down.

If you feel that your current relationship isn’t going anywhere and you’re at the point where you’re both fighting over conflicting plans, it might be best to move on. In the stressful transition after your time here at UCR, you need someone that supports you in your endeavors and motivates you to be your best instead of someone that puts you down or tries to control too much of your life.

If you’re beginning to realize that the relationship you’ve had in the past school year can only been characterized as a fling and it’s time for you to look for something more serious, then by all means consider breaking it off while keeping your future as your best interest. Try not to panic if this is the case — we all still have our lives ahead of us to find that perfect match and who knows? Maybe you’ll encounter him or her at your future job, while you’re out taking a walk or even during the upcoming school year. Life holds many mysteries for us and with every year that progresses, we can only discover more.

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