April Fools

Writing, in recent years, has taken center stage thanks to the meteoric rise of phenomena such as text messaging and Facebook. These days, electronic communication is a cultural constant, if not a societal mandate....

UCR’s radio station KUCR 88.3 FM announced early Wednesday, March 28 that they will be expanding into programming for animals. Their newest program, entitled “Bark Bark Bark,” will feature a local dog from the...

The UCR baseball team squared off against the Zepton Martians this spring break in what could stand as the greatest game and only game they have ever played on our planet. The Martians were...

Dear Highlanders, After decades of disinvestments from the Humanities, Arts and Social Sciences Liberal Education (HASSLE), the Highlander can no longer continue to function alongside an administration that has continued to shun a liberal education....

This is the greatest movie ever made. This movie will end global warming. If you don’t like it then you should feel bad. Rating: 5 stars  

LeBron James wants to suspend his NBA career and finish his academic career while playing basketball at the collegiate level. At the end of the season, James will take his talents to southern California...

By: Steven “We don’t all wear tinfoil hats” McTinfoil The end of the world has arrived early, and surprisingly not in the form of nuclear weaponry. Instead, as reported by the LA Times, ground squirrels have...

The Spring Quarter Shenanigans It's that time of year again — the ________ (adjective) Spring Quarter is here, and the ________ (noun, plural) are ________ (verb, present tense) around campus ________ (adverb). With ________ (noun)...